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Study: Shiftless Staff Members In Name Only With Continuing Access To Update Tools Likely To Remind Former Coworkers of Existence For Kicks On Meaningless Holidays


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A study undertaken by researchers at the Gage Institute has concluded that enabling staff members who have ceased to do anything useful to continue to have their former levels of access to the site can result in their occasionally posting ridiculous updates for their personal edification when presented with fake holidays they enjoy. The head scientist on the study, Liam Dewbiose, indicated that such subjects were as much as 100% likelier to engage in such random prankery than in situations where such opportunities were not present, according to his results.

"To be honest," Dewbiose stated, "this is more or less the outcome we were expecting, but in the interests of neuroscientific credibility, we felt we had to perform this research." To arrive at their finding, the team waited for both April Fool's Day to arrive and the opportunity to present itself, seen as key contributing factors to this condition.

What impact this research will have upon the future of either the site or neurology is uncertain; "We found that the subjects are not necessarily seeking a change in the status quo," Dewbiose remarked, "but only time will tell what the ultimate effects will be, as this is a notoriously unpredictable condition that we are in the very early stages of encountering." The Gage Institute is a respected body in the field of occupational health.

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