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By: Amber Michelle
Xenogears and its characters are (C) Squaresoft.
This is a non-profit fan work, meant for entertainment only.
Was there anything not to love about it? It cooled, it soothed....... and it reminded her of
her mother. And there were so many wonderful, warm things to remember about her
mother. Hugs, and playful songs...... long dresses, and hair that smelled of roses and
fresh grass. The sea spray had never clung to her, like the others; there was always that
scent, mixed with soap, that had lulled her to sleep every night while they waited for her
The salty, earthy scent...... she remembered knowing when he was home before he even
said hello to her, because she would sense it from her room, when he wisked her mother
from the floor and spun her around like she was still a child. Their laughter would
always echo in her head afterward, stopping her tears when she woke up mornings to find
that he had disappeared again without saying good-bye. They made each other happy,
and if Mother was happy enough, then so was she.
Are you happy, Prim-chan?
It all left her, one day. The soft, warm existence she had enjoyed, wrapped in sunshine
and love...... all shattered with one scream, and rivulets of blood staining the kitchen
Her scream. Her own scream.
If she hadn't screamed, they wouldn't have noticed Mother, as she tried to climb into the
loft, to the safety of the rafters to hide. If she hadn't looked, and hidden, like she had
been told to do, behind Billy, Mother would have hidden. Mother would have been safe.
The Wels would have run away without any blood.
But her scream revealed her hiding place...... and her mother wouldn't let them hurt her,
"Leave them be........" Footsteps on the hard wood floor, a scrape as something bumped
into the table. "I am the only one here......" A pause, a clink of glass, metal striking
glass. Not a spoon. The knife on the table. "Would you like some tea?"
Growls, shuffling. Ripping.
"Are you okay, Prim-chan?"
A soft, clean scent...... like rain just abating, mixing with the smells of wet dirt, and
grass, and the lake that was already wrapped around her. The water rippled without any
sound, distorting the reflection of trees and stars and moon as it wavered in its own,
invisible breeze. Her face wavered there like the moon's, almost as if she wasn't really
there at all, but just watching from a long, long distance.
Primera nodded once, fingers reaching up to twine her silvery bangs around her hand the
way her mother used to, when she was too little to brush her own hair. But it was hard
to twirl and she eventually gave up, letting it fall back over her eyes. The air was too
heavy; like the feeling before a storm over the ocean, but it was also cool...... almost, but
not quite, like the touch of water.
Robes rustled; Billy settled down next to her, holding his knees to his chest just as she
was doing, and letting his blue cloak trail out backward in folds that made her think of
the waves of the ocean, or the dark waters of the lake under the bridge. And he turned
his head to look at her through his pale bangs...... even though she couldn't see him, she
felt his eyes touch her face, and it was like the sun touching her face, all sparkling blue.
His hair whispered as he shook his head, turning the warmth away from her to the water
she was staring at so viligently.
"Father is leaving again."
The music of his voice mixed with the singing of the lake's water, and she smiled, just a
little. Then she blinked, and turned her face toward her brother to show him that smile;
to say that she didn't mind. She knew he understood...... he was the only one, aside from
Midori, who always knew what she said.
She loved her brother. Did he know that?
He must. The answering smile he turned her way shined as brightly as his eyes, kind and
caring and protective, just like their mother. "You don't mind. You never mind, Prim-chan. You're so forgiving...... you put me to shame." There was no sting in the words. It
was pure and strong, like his faith.
She tugged on his sleeve, spreading her hands when he glanced at her again.
"What? I don't know where he's going. But Sig is going with him, so it can't be that
bad." He frowned, dimming his pale features like a cloud over the sun. She shivered,
feeling the same kind of chill. "He looks angry...... but he won't say anything. And
Sigurd...... I don't know what's wrong with him. I wish I did; then I could help him......"
He let his head fall. "I should help Father too. I know I should. You say it all the time,
even though I can't hear it."
She nodded once, reaching again to pat the soft cloak over his shoulder. But she never
had to try to tell him anything, because he always told himself. He always knew what he
had to do, and how he had to handle it. She wished she were more like him.
Maybe when she was older......
"I should be more like you, Prim-chan." He smiled again, dimmer than before. "You're
always so sweet...... and you're more grown up than I am, I sometimes think. You should
be the one scolding Father, not me."
The hostility was gone...... it didn't blight his light anymore, like it used to. She could
feel things like that, when it was Billy. She knew him better than anyone else. Five
years had made as much difference in him she sometimes imagined he was partly
another person. Or a different season of the same person.
Did anyone else see things like this, and hear things like this?
Anyone besides her mother?
A wind started, brushing the water and ruffling their hair, whispering over his cloak and
through the grass like a choir of voices just beyond the edge of hearing. But it was
there...... maybe the sisters were singing again, and she was too distracted to hear
anything but their echoes.
"...... Hear that?" Billy asked softly, head tilted as if he were listening to something. He
ran a hand through his bangs, keeping them clear of his eyes, and his hair added its
whispers to the song she heard. "Someone must be singing. Margie's ascension is only a
few days away. Maybe they're practicing."
The song she heard....... the song they heard.
Billy rose, standing tall in the moonlight, and looking down at her with the warmth of his
eyes. "It's late, Prim-chan. I hope you'll come inside soon."
He brushed her forehead with his f