Weakness
Josh Gurfinkel
x_the_unknown1@hotmail.com


Author's Note:

Okay, so this is the second character-driven story I've written, and I kind of like this one more than the last... a bit... maybe not... I can't decide... At any rate, it's here, so you should read it. It's about Magus, from Chrono Trigger. He's the sorcerer guy. He's evil. Yeah.

Um... it takes place AFTER Crono dies, but right before the group meets up with Magus on that cliff (where you get the option of fighting him again)... So here it is, in all it's glorious gloriness:


I stare at her picture. Not an actual photograph, mind you, for those were days before cameras, before science. At least, the type of science these pathetic beings claim to understand. No, the picture I stare at exists only in my mind. For a long time, my mind had been the only remaining mind in which it could exist. After all, millions of years had passed since her time, our time. Any other being who might have known her would have passed away long ago. I cherished that idea, as much as I abhorred it. The most beautiful, most perfect woman in the world once existed only in my memories. I am, of course, glad that her memory continued to live on. But a being as radiant, as perfect as her deserves to live on in the minds of every being, not just one, and not one such as I. I am... unworthy of knowing her.

I loved my sister with every fibre of my being. I would've given my very life for her.

I... came back here to stop one of the greatest tragedies mankind has ever known. I came back here to destroy the alien. That being which could survive longer than any being.

But I never... never imagined the power he really controlled. With a simple thought he eradicated my entire offensive. With but a gesture I almost died at his hands. And then he went after her again. I almost cried, thinking that it was all for naught. That I could've come back with the intention of saving her, only to watch her die once more. In that instant, I told myself to stand up, to fight. But I froze. Never in my entire worthless existence have I felt myself freeze before an opponent. How... how could I be so weak? Lavos was practically breathing down her neck, now, ready to kill her and the others at my mother's beckon call. I prepared myself to leap between them, Schala and the beast. But I was still frozen. And... he beat me to it. He sacrificed his very life for her and his allies -- and me. Why? Why could he move, why could he perform an act I was incapable of? Am I not stronger? I've trained myself since childhood, since I arrived in the future in that godforsaken forest, with those ridiculous Mystics, waiting for the one day I could return to Lavos and tear him apart. And yet, this boy, this Crono, an individual who has likely not trained for combat a day in his life, was able to show more courage, more power, than I? How?

All I ever wanted was to save her. And now she is gone from me again... because I was incapable of displaying an amount of courage equal to that of a simple teenager.

Perhaps, Janus, the very problem that keeps you from attaining your goal of saving Schala is Schala herself.

"Who...?" I ask to the darkness surrounding me. At the moment, I have entered into a state of meditation my mother once taught me of. While in this state, I exist outside of time and space. There is not a soul in the world that should be able to find me here.

You are so weak-minded, Janus. I can sense your presence anywhere, no matter how hard you try to hide yourself from me.

I am annoyed now. Not only has this being interrupted my meditation, it dares to claim superiority over me. It insinuates that it is more powerful than I.

"Leave me now, fool, lest I exert my wrath upon you. I am not in the mood for games, or idle threats."

Idle threats?

A horrible laughter echoes across the emptiness surrounding me.

Child, do you not sense my power? You are in no position to order me around, Janus.

My... my god, it's right! I was so irritated before at having been interrupted, I didn't even notice... this power... is incredible.

And... familiar.

"Lavos!? Wh, where are you?" I search frantically, my heart no longer beating in my chest. How did he find me? Will he... kill me, as he did Crono?

Not quite, my boy, but very close. I assumed my voice would have given me away as a woman... but then again, you never were a very bright boy, now were you Janus? You've always failed as a citizen of the superior Zeal Kingdom.

And as a son.

Mother...

"When did you gain all this power, Zeal? Surely you weren't so foolish as to accept it from Lavos himself?"

Foolish? Lavos is God, Janus. To accept His gift is to be made an angel, a warrior of heaven. To exist alongside Him is to serve in His kingdom. Such is his power, Janus... and it is wonderful. You should feel it, my offspring. You should join me, and serve Lavos in bringing forth his Armageddon. Though you've failed me before, I am still willing to accept you back into the kingdom.

"The kingdom? What kingdom, you bitch? Have you forgotten that you destroyed Zeal and most of its people in your mad quest for power?"

I am the kingdom, Janus! The kingdom will continue to exist so long as I do.

Lavos will make me immortal... thus, the kingdom will never die. But, you, Janus... you can still serve by my side. Your power is remarkable. With Lavos' aid, it can be increased tenfold. All you need do is let go of your sole weakness: the compassion you carry for your treacherous sister.

Schala... my weakness? That's insane... I...

"I love Schala."

And so you continue to fail in your efforts. Emotion is what holds you back from becoming all that you can be.

Is she... is she right? Did I freeze because I was unable to control my love for Schala... because I was so afraid of losing her? No... something... there's something wrong with that. I can't grasp it, though... something is blocking me from... from...

"Get out of my head, woman!"

I'm afraid that would be impossible Janus. I only found you by tracing your psychic wavelength... I exist here, not through my own meditation, but through yours. You see, I did not enter your mind in this space that exists outside of space... I am, right now, in your mind, in reality.

Oh god. If she's there now, she can lock my mind in this dimension... use my body for her own purposes... I have to break out of this meditation before...

I cannot let you do that, Janus. I need you to stay here... until our conversation is finished...

"You will not hypnotize me, the way Lavos has hypnotized you, mother. I would sooner die than follow you!"

Hmpf... why, Janus? For her? She's kept you from everything, my son. Your obsession with saving her has cost you the majority of you life. Only I can give that back to you, Janus. Forget her... she has held you back for so very long.

Her words make sense to me... but I keep feeling there's something I'm missing... something I've... forgotten...

And suddenly, I hear that blasted woman's voice in my head. Not mother, not Schala, but Marle... screaming, begging the child to stop, to step down, not to sacrifice himself... she shouts...

"CRONO!"

Ugh... that woman... what is it about her... that's so important?

You've been quiet for a while now, my heir. Why? What thoughts are running through that puny little mind of yours?

No... don't interrupt me now, not when I'm so close. I hear her shout again... but I can't make out the words...

"I.l..e..ou!"

What... what is she screaming...? Why does it seem so important...?

"I lo.e..ou!"

Dammit, why can't I hear her?

"I love..ou!"

She... loves...

"I love you!"

Yes... that's why... you are wrong mother.

What?

"My love for Schala is not my weakness... it is my strength. Just as Crono's love allowed him to sacrifice himself for Marle. My only weakness was my fear of losing her again... it paralysed me once before... but my love for her... my love for her is all that keeps me living."

How touching, Janus.

Sigh, it's almost a shame you'll never be able to tell her that. If you refuse to join me, Janus, I'll simply have to shut you down.

No... I can feel her destroying my mind... I have to... I have to stop her...

Goodbye, my son. I truly do love you, Janus. I sincerely will miss you.

"Shut up, woman... get the hell out of my head!"

I concentrate all my forces on finding her... somewhere within my mind.

There.

What are you...?

"Get. Out."

I force all my energy into a single cloud, a mist of pure power... and I throw it directly at her presence.

I hear her scream out in anguish, and I continue pouring my energy towards her.

You fool! This much energy... you'll shut your own psyche down in the process of killing me.

"If that is how it must be, to finally be rid of you, bitch."

Arrgh. Very well, have it your way, Janus. I will leave you for now... but know that you are only delaying the inevitable.

I sense her presence is gone.

I relax for a moment, and then return to my body in the physical realm.

Behind me, as I return, I sense the presence of that accursed frog...


Just when you thought it was safe to press the back button... AUTHOR'S NOTE x2:

Okay, so I hope you liked the story. As usual, send compliments to x_the_unknown1@hotmail.com, and flames to abcd@efghi.jkl... heh... suckers...

Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters in this story. Square does. In fact, after they sued me for the last fanfic I wrote, I don't actually own anything anymore... sigh...