Oh - thank goodness I'm awake. I had the most horrible dream -
I had to write the RPGamer fanfic section update, and I only had
five hours left to go, and if I didn't do it in time Alanna was
going to eat my eyeballs!
What's that? I am writing the RPGamer fanfic section
update with only five hours left to go? And Alanna is, as we
speak, preparing various cooking implements and spices?
In that case, I suppose it's fortunate that I never got that
laser eye surgery. Man, I would have felt pretty bad about wasting
all that money.
Roger's First Order of Business:
Two burgers and a medium drink.
Roger's Second, and Slightly More Serious Order Of Business
That He'd Better Get To Right Quick Before He Gets
Way back in the day (last year), I believe on my last update, I
made a comment about the wide variety and depth of the continuum of
console games that were mocking me with their refusal to be
beaten. "Help!" I cried to all those who were listening nearby.
"I need help with these games!", only I said it with fewer calls
for help and more swearing and throwing of random items out the
This is the lesson for today: A cheaper, if more
time-consuming, alternative to strategy guides is becoming an
RPGamer fanfiction editor. I'm kidding; I'm not in this job for
the tips, I'm in it for the money! I get paid nothing you know,
and Matt just yesterday offered to double my salary. Life
The point is, I was having problems with three games (Chrono
Cross, Vagrant Story, and Final Fantasy VIII) and - thanks to kind
readers with an e-mail client and some spare time - have now beaten
them all! So thanks go out to those folks who I didn't reply to
personally because my computer was, at the time, catching fire.
That's the real lesson for today: Technology is evil.
Notes From Fanfic Land
Just a quick reminder: If you have questions about anything regarding the RPGamer fanfic department, mail firstname.lastname@example.org. Mailing editors' personal mailboxes will sometimes seriously delay a response -- like now, when Alanna is really only around one day out of the week to upload the update and answer email.
Plus, a small request: when you HTML your own files (which we prefer), please do not use non-standard colors or font sizes. Not only does it increase the time we have to spend to make the fanfic fit our own formatting template, all of us use webmail for RPGamer stuff, and most webmail providers will only render certain HTML tags -- which means that your fanfic usually winds up unreadable.
Writing Tip of the Week
From Alanna: Use titles well. The title can tell you a lot about a story, such as what the reader is supposed to concentrate on, or what kind of a theme the story is supposed to have. If you can't think of a good title, resist the urge to call it something generic; get someone who's good with titles to read your story and tell you what it reminds them of. When in doubt, song titles usually work. Just don't tell anyone I told you that.
Roger "forgot the filename of his banner" Ostrander
18 in Accept
16 in the Inbox
Fan Fiction Staff
Lady of Temporal Termination
The Wench In Charge
Nerdy Guy in the Corner
Prolific Empowerer of the
Ferryman of the Ethereal Weave
Goddess of Unfinished Fanfiction
Technical Assistant and Nifty Person