A Villain's Guide To World Domination: Hero vs. Villain Confrontations

by Fawkes

I have written this document in hopes that it will be studied and used to spread evil around the worlds, and finally get rid of the pesky heroes who always seem to ruin our plans. The techniques that have been detailed in this document are proven to be correct and will work in 99.9% of all hero cases.

Heroes often bring their best friend heroes with them to do battle with us villains. It is usually three-on-one, but sometimes is four, five-on-one or perhaps even an army. Not many villains out there can claim that they've fought against more than one hero at a time and won. So, I have devised a way to make sure we villains will always have only the main hero fight us (in a weakened state), thus gaining victory.

Begin the battle with the routine crazed laughter and speech. This should have the hero stunned by your amazing writing and memorization ability. They will be unable to attack you in this state, but may argue and curse at you anyway. At this time, command your minions to capture the heroes and hold them in one of your best dungeons. The heroes will soon find a key or a fellow hero to let them out very soon, so make sure the fights are quick.

Take out one hero at a time. Quickly dispatch him/her using your unlimited magic ability and 9999 damage attacks. Repeat this until the last hero remains (preferably the leader). This hero will give a speech of his own and then become emotional and be able to defeat you. You must do what the hero wasn't able to. Once the hero begins his speech, attack him! Don't allow him to speak. This will stop the god-like emotional rage sequence and make the fight a pushover. After this battle, make sure to dispose of the bodies by burning them and watching. The heroes may be faking the death only to get at you while you aren't paying attention.

If you forget a step, or the hero outsmarts one of the steps (highly unlikely), quickly teleport away. All of us villains have the ability to teleport at any time to any location in the blink of an eye, if any of you didn't already know. After teleporting away, go over the steps again, or formulate a new plan. Then you can try it again whenever you want. Oh, and you don't have to worry about starting up your plan again too soon since the heroes will never have any recollection about any of your previous plans. Good luck and happy killings!

-Written by the one they call Death, aka Vicious Heartless Killer aka Doctor Destruction aka Velorctr R`Tulyfe aka Prince/King Evil aka Ghalroth

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