Your skills of observation are unrivalled, JuMeSyn. But I suppose the only reason you know this is because of your recent ascension to staff. I told you personally, if I recall. You should feel important.

Well, time to do this... for the last time.

Oh God... I'm struggling to remember the specifics. I believe it was Shawn "Lusipurr" Cooper who first uttered the name. (Shock, I know.) I believe it was on an episode of RPGcast, and for some ungodly reason the name stuck. Don't ask me why, and don't ask me how it came to Shawn's head, because I don't know. To be frank, I don't want to know how it came to Shawn's head, or how anything in Shawn's head works.

I haven't bought the game, and I'm a little surprised at myself for that. I absolutely loved the last Fire Emblem that made its way to American shores, which was Radiant Dawn. But for some odd reason, I've had a really difficult time sticking with the portable games I play these days. Chrono Trigger, Dragon Quest IV DS, even the original Fire Emblem on the GBA, remain unfinished. Because of this I've been rather wary about purchasing Shadow Dragon, despite my intense and undying love for the series.

Bah, have no regrets. Money is there to be spent, and from my experience, videogames are among the more worthwhile pastimes to spend hard-earned dollars on.

I listened, and I was pleased. Judging by the theme alone, I am inclined to believe that it does, indeed, belong to "The Man."

An end boss that renders all the skill and mechanics learned throughout the game useless, and forces you to resort to inane tactics that any ordinary boob with a thumb could pull off? I think that's brilliant, personally. Your 1.0 score is horribly unjust, and I demand a recount.

Y'know, I've never played a Rogue before, and from what I've read about them I have absolutely no desire to ever try one. They sound more like an exercise in utter frustration than anything else. There's a difference between challenge and frustration, and Rogues sound like an example of the latter. Some people may enjoy this type of thing for whatever reason, and that's fine I suppose. But like I said, I haven't played a Rogue, so I should probably stop talking about them before I royally piss someone off.

Ah, come on JMS. Who says this has to be our last correspondence? This is the internet, for crying out loud. I'm positive you'll have opportunities in the future to provide me with links to various musical pieces.

Besides, I'm listening to Smashing Pumkins right now.

I actually entertained the notion of picking up Yggdra Union just for the sake of expanding my PSP library, which is currently the smallest among all my systems. But then I was hit in the face with the realization that I'm actually not made of money, and I probably shouldn't buy games just so they can look nice on my shelf. Even though that is, admittedly, a lot of fun. To me, at least. Just that "collector's mentality" kicking in.

I feel I've learned quite a bit from your letters, JMS. And who knows, all this Sega-related knowledge I've gleaned may come in handy somewhere, someday; so for that I thank you in advace. But more importantly than that, you've been a consistent and constructive contributor to this column during the time I've been here, and I can't thank you enough for that. I doubt you'll see me back at RPGamer, but I'll be in some dark corner of the internets, making my opinions known to the world: this much I can guarantee.

Well I hate to tell you this, but it's only going to get more uncertain from here, since this is my last column and next week is the last you'll see of Ethan. But that aside, it's me this week, so let's get to it!

Valkyria Chronicles IS one awesome game, as I hopefully made clear in the review I wrote for it. If my memory serves me right, it took me just over 40 hours to complete, which I punched in over the course of about a month. I'm not sure what you mean by "mastering" all the classes; I believe I managed to upgrade them all if that's what you mean. I haven't played a great many tactical games, with my experience mainly lying in the realm of Fire Emblem, but Valkyria Chronicles is probably the best experience I've ever had with the genre. Games such as Final Fantasy Tactics and Fire Emblem: Radiant Dawn outclass it in the plot/story department, but the tactical gameplay is, in my opinion, the best to be had.

And about Dead Space: my roommate actually bought me that game for Christmas, and I've been meaning to get around to it for the longest time... but what with my limited game time and Persona 4's great length, that hasn't happened yet.

Ba-ha. Perhaps I should have let Ethan handle this one, since the KH-loving reviewer you're speaking of is, in fact, him.

As for our scoring system, the presence of .5 scores (3.5, 4.5, et cet) means that we do, in fact, have a 10-point scale. We're not the only ones with such a scale, might I add. If you prefer 20-point scales, that's fine, but I doubt we'll be changing ours anytime soon. And I disagree with the assertion that "you can't accurately point out all a game has to offer in 5." Regardless of the grading scale, the text of the review is responsible for pointing out all that is bad and good in a game. My advice: especially in this day and age, pay more attention to the text of a site's reviews and less to these token numerical scorings.

Oh, and I hate to break this to you, but I love Kingdom Hearts as well.

Nope. I had little interest in The Last Hope to begin with, (largely because I've never played any of the previous games in the series) and I have even less after reading the reviews. It's true that most of them were more positive than ours, but not a single one I've read has had a good thing to say about the game's plot/dialogue. And I'm sorry, but as the years go by I grow more and more tired of JRPG plotlines in general, so I feel no need to subject myself to a particularly bad one.

Kingdom Hearts does have a few token RPG elements that aren't present in the Zelda series, such as levels and experience points, some more involved skill and equipment management, and party combat. In all, the game feels more like an action-RPG than Zelda does. The funny thing about the KH series is that, despite how much I love it, I find myself at a loss for words when I try to defend it from haters. I simply take comfort in my love for the games and leave it at that.

EWNB, you've been another great and consistent contributor to my column, and I'm gonna miss talking to you. I wish you well in all of your future gaming endeavours, and leave you with these final words of wisdom: drop the Xbox hatred already. It's just not worth it, man.

Um... lol?

What's really funny about this letter is that you're not just venting... the way you phrase it, it sounds like you're demanding an actual redress of grievances. Unfortunately, when it comes to one man's subjective opinion, such a thing is impossible.

Fire Adrian? He's practically the only reviewer we have left at this point! And he's not "in crack," I might add; although he may, in fact, be ON crack. We don't make inquiries into such personal matters here.

I do have to commend you for your passion, I suppose. Most simply settle for spamming the board thread attached to the review with flameage. Although hilariously (and don't take too much offense from this) your letter is less coherent than most of the posts on that thread right now. But the odds were stacked against you - people who complain about review scores, in general, just look like idiots.

Sorry to be so blunt, but it's true. Disagree if you want, but personal insults in response to subjective opinions are unnecessary, unconstructive, and moronic. Grow up.

Awww... Max... you DO care!

Max, I'm gonna miss this place, there's no doubt about it. But all good things must come to an end. What's that one line from The Dark Knight? "You either die a hero, or live long enough to see yourself become the villain."

Somehow, someway, that appropriately sums up the situation.